Why Women Fake Orgasms

When women fake orgasms...what to do about it.

It's sad but true. A large percentage of women at some point in their sex lives have faked an orgasm. According to online research a whopping 70% of women have faked it.

So it's probably safe to assume that most men have slept with a woman who pretended to be satisfied.

This statistic may have to do with how often and when boys and girls start masturbating. With boys, erections are obvious and the pleasure is easy, just grab and go. According to an article on Healthystrokes.com, by age 15, nearly 100% of boys have masturbated to orgasm and the average male will masturbate at least 1000 times before he has sex with a girl. Girls, on the other hand, tend not to start as early or do it as often. Some don't start until their late teens and some never masturbate at all. So by the time people become sexually active, women tend to be less experienced with their bodies than men.

All that being said though, here is the short and nasty on why women fake orgasms:

She is tired and wants to get it over with.
She's not in the mood but didn't want to hurt your feelings by turning you down and now just wants to get it over with.
She IS in the mood but for whatever reason she knows it's not going to happen and she's embarrassed to say so.
She's getting sore and wants it to end before the pain gets worse.
She's afraid she is taking too long and she doesn't want you to get bored or tired.

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For the record, we don't believe faking it is EVER a good idea. (Sometimes men fake it too but much less so than women.) Women are very concerned about men's egos and think that if they are honest, they will turn a man off and the whole mood will be ruined. When women fake orgasms it's dishonest and will not help men learn about their partner and what does and doesn't please her. We ladies need to get over our fear of making our needs known.

I like to think that for most men, turning a woman on and giving her pleasure is a great ego boost. What could be better than seeing your woman writhing around and moaning in pleasure because of what you're doing? But there are probably guys out there who don't care if the woman gets off and only want to get off themselves. This article assumes you care about your partner's experience in bed and want to do what you can to make it great for both of you.

So guys, what's going on here is women are afraid to talk about it. What can you do about this? Women need to know that they can say what's on their minds without worrying that you are going to judge them, become defensive, get mad or impatient, or generally not be willing to listen. So for starters, you can help her feel more comfortable about opening up to you. She needs to know you aren't going to wig out and feel criticized if she's honest with you. Women fake orgasms because they don't want to risk you getting upset.

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Sometime when you are together but NOT in bed, pour a glass of wine, get relaxed on the couch, and start a conversation. This might seem awkward at first but believe me, she will appreciate the opportunity to talk about sex. Having sex with someone makes a woman feel very vulnerable and the safer she feels and the more accepted you make her feel, the more she'll open up and let herself relax sexually. Don't be afraid to come right out and ask her what works for her. Or to tell her that you really want to please her and want to know how. Open communication is the key to an honest and great sex life.

Here is a quick primer on woman and sex…most women can't orgasm from intercourse alone. Only about 25-30% of women can have orgasms this way without any additional stimulation. So…if you aren't versed in how to bring a woman to orgasm, start learning about female anatomy right now. Women fake orgasms when they're frustrated. Most women need direct clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm so if you make it a priority to learn how to do this, I promise you won't have problems with women faking it. Every woman is different in terms of what she likes, but generally speaking, she has to be WET or touching her clitoris will actually be painful. Use a lubricant if necessary. A light touch is generally also best, although this too varies, so you have to ask when you touch a woman, "How does that feel?" Or guide her to show you with her own hand.

There are lots of good books on how to make love to a woman. Start reading and learning and become the best lover you can be so your woman never feels the need to fake it. Here are a few good titles:

Or check out these other interesting E-books:

Female Orgasm Sex Guide

Have the best sex humanly possible

Orgasmology - The Art of Sex

The most famous FAKE ORGASM ever, courtesy of YouTube
and the movie, "When Harry Met Sally."

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