Why nice guys struggle with women but always fail.

by Manlife
(Nairobi)

I would like to say that it's true nice guy finish last. They do things that show the world that they are not worthy or insecure and so they don't get the woman they want. If at all they are in a relationship, they are dumped. I remember when I went to college; I was somehow a "nice guy" though I wasn't that kind that agrees with everything a woman says, unless it makes sense. Another thing is that I was confident to approach the most beautiful ladies in that college. But the problem was that after knowing each other I could work so hard to make her talk to me. Whenever she was rushing somewhere I stopped her, and tried to talk to her even if she never wanted to. I remember one girl called Esther. I really liked her beauty, scent, her voice, lips, sweet dimples, name, even the rest. We used to talk but before getting her into the nest as my girlfriend, she started avoiding me whenever we met. The stupid thing I did was to be waiting for her at the corridor and following her to say hi to her, even when the signs were pretty clear that she never wanted me. Of course you know what happened. I lost, watching some "I don't care guys" being hugged by beautiful women. I call them "I don't care" not because they are careless but because they didn't work hard to get women while women jumped to them. Before I met Esther I had met another lady named Linda who had gone to University elsewhere. I bought a necklace for her, but whenever I called to pick her gift she said she would, and never did. Imagine for one full year! So I deposited it in the dust bin.

Later I came to learn this and I regretted why I was that nice guy. I started working on my problem. When I got a contract in a certain company I found a fine lady there but this time I had learnt how to be independent when it comes to attracting a woman. This lady knew that I admired her. When other ladies found out and told me to ask her out, I said NO with comfort. You know what? She started asking me to escort her till at her gate, but still I wasn't asking her out. I could tell them that she was beautiful but relaxed, no hurry. I left the company and she still had interest to talk to me. Later I met Linda again. This was after almost 2 years. I had even deleted her number from my phone book. The last few times we had met 2 years before I had shown some disinterest in her but happy. So here she is. Just on the street she screamed "whooo hug me, hug me" as we hugged each othe. Why? She had seen a different me! The man who is emotionally independent and not the long time insecure nice guy. When I looked back and discovered that what made me to be a nice guy in college was that I was a little desperate, rushing after women. Now that I am with my own life, scheduling dates is becoming a bit difficult since the number of ladies on my list is just increasing.

So, this is it, nice guys do things that portray weakness:
1) Having dependent life on a woman. He believes without a certain woman he will die.
2) On approaching a lady he's afraid to let the lady go. He goes on struggling to make her listen to him.
3) In relationship, he does everything, fearing that the wife or fiancée will go if he doesn't. Just play your part and leave for her to play hers. If she goes say a genuine goodbye to her. Will you die? No.
4) He doesn't have a program of his own. Whenever he plans to do something, his woman puts it off without compromising. Then he cools down and says "ok."
5) He believes arguing with his woman is a violent behavior. So he'll rather keep quiet.
6) He apologizes even if he is not in the wrong.
7) He can be denied sex for months as the woman gets emotional love from him whenever she wants. Surely, if she's in 30s, her libido is at the peak. Is she enduring for those all months? She's getting it from elsewhere.


There are 3 main things that drive nice guys to do this:
1) They love the life of their women more than theirs.
2) They don't believe a woman can just love a man unless the man has done some stupid things for her, and acted weak.
3) They believe that the woman is above the law. She's free to do anything whether it's inhuman.

So, I'd like to tell nice guys to recover from that disease. It doesn't matter whether you are married or engaged.