Bipolar or Schizophrenic?
by Big Al
I think the most important advice I ever got was from a psychology professor friend of mine who told me to learn from my previous relationships and figure out why you are with the same type of person. Until you do that, you will repeat a cycle of behavior and never change. This is true whether you are a drug addict, alcoholic, or just fail in relationships. The last paragraph of the previous writer was probably the most important. Think about your reasons for wanting to stay with this person. Is it simply security? Do you not want to hurt their feelings? Do you think they will move on and be fine without you? The last one is one that you need to look at and evaluate your own self-interest. Give yourself some time with these evaluations. If you are truly with someone because you both love each other, time is immaterial. History has shown us that two lovers separated by time and distance will prevail if their feelings are strong enough. If the other person won't change after you have given a serious effort, and I mean by you changing yourself, really changing your thoughts, attitudes, and most importantly your behavior. Then now is the time to evaluate your leaving the relationship. I have been divorced from my ex-wife now for 7 years, and I am just now learning how to effectively communicate with her regarding the kids. As you've heard before there is a learning curve that takes years sometimes to master. Think about your profession for instance; you did not become a doctor, lawyer, or shop supervisor in a day. You never stop learning in your workplace. Just apply the same attitude in your personal life and you will find you will be happier, more satisfied, and able to work through things in time.
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