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I'm Afraid to Show My Feelings
Dear WWWFM,
I think I'm falling in love with a woman I've known for a month now, but am afraid to let my feelings show. We go places and do things together but have not been physically intimate yet. I know she wants to go slower, but I can't help the way that I feel. We planned a night together this week, and when she didn't call me tonight as she told me she would, it bothered me. How do I keep my feelings in check? What should I do?
Dear Steve,
A month is not very much time to get to know someone, so respect her wish to take it slow, which is generally a wise move anyway. It's fine that you have strong feelings, in fact it's wonderful! But if she isn't matching your passion just yet, be patient. It can be a turn-off for a woman when a man comes on too strong too soon. For example, it would be way too soon to tell her you love her. You don't want to scare her away by being overbearing.
Just keep spending time together as you have been and take your cues from her as to how far and fast to move. I'm not saying that she gets to dictate the relationship, but in this early stage, it's reasonable to take it a day at a time and see how feelings develop on both sides. You don't have to keep your feelings chained to a tree, just the impulse to blurt out something like, "You're my soul mate!" or "Will you marry me?" Go ahead and be affectionate. Show your feelings by being romantic i.e. buy her flowers, plan special and fun dates. And definitely give her a kiss if you haven't already.
Rushing things in a relationship is usually not a good idea. Have faith that the perfect moment will present itself when it feels right to declare your love. In the meantime, relax, have fun, but don't be overbearing by calling too often. Also, don't be afraid to show your feelings by doing nice little things like holding her hand or sending her a romantic ecard.
Trust that the timing of everything is perfect and that you don't have to worry or try to control anything.

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